过大礼 - mainly cakes (preparation 2)

Ah Lau and Mum sat down to talk about the 过大礼 stuff that we need to give each other. And thank God both sides agree (with Ah Lau's mum's consent) that everything can be simplified. No more going big in the heads about those Chinese traditional stuff.

The main thing is that, Mum has upped the number of cakes from 6 to 10 for a nice number. But she has decided not to ask for the traditional Teochew cookies and wedding cakes (I mean come on, She is Teochew but I am Hokkien! But she insisted we follow the Teochew ways because I grew up in her household...)

Anyways, to cut everything short, we are having a mixture of Teochew and Hokkien style 过大礼 items which to my delight, I can have a say in them too. 

So here is the revised list of items that Ah Lau has to give me

- 10 boxes of wedding cake

- 12 oranges

- Jewellery

- 5 types of sweets (I asked for this), like melon slices, dried longans, lotus seeds, red dates and peanuts

- Dragon and Phoenix candles to be substituted with lamps (if we can find them)

- Betrothal red packet (like duh!)

- 2 bottles of red wine for my Dad

- 1 roast pig for my Mum

- 1 老嫲糕 for my Ah Ma

And here is the list from me to him

- Dragon and Phoenix candles to be substituted with lamps (if we can find them)

- 2 bottles of orange juice

- 1 tea cup set

- 1 set of bed linen

- 1 set of pants and a belt

Finally! We can now pop to JB and get them there which is way cheaper than in SG. By the way, we had some sort of confusing thoughts (mostly from my Mum) about the types of wedding cakes. At first, she asked for Teochew style wedding cakes which are these:

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtN3GGcfy-YiQnRjN_6juNDQXJQjFRvyT_M_mTwdr0lvFD6tXhgll3UPBhilvOtAlX9vaCx7OAHNa7AUg5vqT1_n6WotGQBfGMEhkCQ9ZpAWiXGnvpMk2utOuu8cPf18l_7CFllU71bDpV/s1600/DSCF0409.jpg

When I showed her the brochure, she was like no no no not these. Then I showed her the Hokkien style which consists mainly of sweets and no cakes, plus 2 cans of pig trotters.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-nU7pk2E8dBs/UMYmvlgKhgI/AAAAAAAAQrE/FBoMZ6PD3mk/s1600/20121209_123345.jpg

Finally, she told me what she'd wanted which are the more modern types like these:

http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2805/10164968365_581602778b_o.jpg

I yelled back a big no no no, because although I am a sucker for cute small cream cakes like these, I am not able ready to give these to my relatives because first of all, they are modern and too sweet. They just do not symbolise anything at all, and lastly, cut cakes when given as gifts are ugly and lack respect (in my opinion).

So we settled on a half traditional, half ang mo type which are these:

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjS3JqwYa2mAeR9MFnIDA_oXRLHYkyWyq-bFxbpCWdhjnX3jwxHUV4U7ouLIIM1qour12EEsq05hftdhDCbkYzItmZ7PJo9CERAyU62BhZ0yKnGyQ66c27A8JUVW-Yk0gBONrQMb0pNfh4/s1600/28032010(001).jpg

I recalled always receiving cakes such as these when I was young and although I don't like eating them because they are mostly dry and I don't fancy dry cakes, I actually like those wafer-like roses and what little green cream as leaves on the cake. I find them very pretty and always try to preserve them for as long as I can.

Lastly, since we are now no longer going towards the Teochew style, the baskets that Ah Lau brings these things in to my parents have to be the Hokkien style ones already (and since I am a Peranakan, we can't deviate away from their Hokkien baskets). 

https://tampines1.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/dsc_00441.jpg

The black and red ones are the Hokkien ones but Peranakan ones have a more rounded top (or so said by my Mum) while the one in straw colour is used by Teochews.

So be honest, this is the most fun part of my preparation of my wedding - not the gown choosing (although I must say, it does make me feel like a princess and important. Ha!), not the photoshoot, not the shoe shopping or sourcing for photographers and wedding bands. It is actually the preparation of the 过大礼haha! 

I know, I am weird. But I really am finally feeling the excitement which kind of died down a little in me in the midst of choosing the dresses, shoes and other things. Can't wait to drive around like mad and give these cakes away!

Photoshoot

Wow!

I always know that make-up makes wonders to my face but not THIS much! Gonna photo-spam on whatever I can take from my photoshoot on Friday.

I can haz pouty look

After accessories and lipstick

There you go!

Snapshot before another round of photo-taking

Told my make-up artist I want a veil that touches the floor and she gave one to me straight away!

Feathers checked, flowers checked, lace checked, crystals checked; I love this look so much!

I think I look a little older than my age here but it's only for the day-time look. 

Bought a $5 giant and super heavy hair clip from Carousell and am loving it to the max!

And yap! It's for my tea dress peranakan costume. Back to my roots yo!

My make-up artist left for the day when I went back to the studio to change from my peranakan costume. One of the kind consultant helped me let down my hair because I ain't going out for an outdoor shoot in my hair like a Ah So! 

Turns out, my hair ain't curly anymore and I had this hair in a mess bad-girl look. No complaints, I think I look good =)

This is the pink dress with the super long peacock tail but you can't see from here, only the tons of fake flowers at my bust area. I wore white sneakers from Cotton On just for this look and that pair of damn shoes costed me $19.90. 

Bridal nails (for photoshoot)

Alrightly,

It was a tough decision to decide that I need to go for nail extension after knowing how expensive it costs. If it is just for the photoshoot, I can always ask the photographer to photoshop it on or just not focus on my nails altogether.

My mum was super bend on me looking good so she pushed me on a bus to JB's city square to do my nails. I picked a french manicure simply because I don't want super long nails and  I was not about ready to pay so much for nails.

I must say that even though I would like more add-ons, they look extremely fine on me!

Dress picked (3)

Hello!

It's finally time to show guys my dresses! Although 2 of them aren't taken nicely and therefore can't be posted but the main gist is there. Take a look!

This is the evening gown for the actual day. It is in bright chili red with a little bit of wiremesh-like material for the skirt, in fact, it is more shimmery and glittery than anything. 

As you guys know, I don't like belts but the giant ribbon at the waist does magnify my small waist a little bit more and and crystals at the chest area (although I hated them at first sight) were very flatteringly beautiful especially under light. 

One bad thing when I put it on, was how tight it was at my armpits and how loose it is at my waist. It was so bad that even though I am so underweight, I had whatever left of my fats being squeezed out from my under arms, making me look fat! I yelled a big no no because that clearly isn't the way to wear a bustier-dress. As usual, the people there ie my consultant, the seamstress etc all tried to convince me that that was because the bustier is a straight line across my chest and not a sweetheart line. Excuse me! Just how can that make my under arms look fat? 

So the designer (who is a man, thank God!) was there to suggest that he will sew a little coarse cloth some sort like the one on my skirt there to cover the 'fats'. I jumped into it straight away because there is no way I would want to pick another dress over such a small thing.  

Anyways, on a side note, I didn't know I hunch back that much in real life. Yucks!

This would be THE wedding dress for my actual day. When I put it on, I was kinda pissed that it was still in that A-line skirt style when I had specifically told them to mermaid it. The original designer who always wanted to force things down my throat was thankfully not there and the kind gentleman designer sewed a mermaid cutting for me straight away and even gave me ideas on how it will look like etc. I am so so grateful for him. 

And this would be the princess dress that I will be wearing for the outdoor photo shoot. I guess there would have been dozens of brides wearing this before me since it is one of the dresses to be chosen for an outdoor photo shoot. But I like it at first size. The corset was filled with many sequins and crystals. And most importantly, it is a very clear different look from my actual day's dress. I meant to look like a runaway princess in this look. 

I picked a short pink dress that has a super looooooooooooong peacock tail with shades of yellow and violet in it as another look for the outdoor shoot. For that, Ah Lau and I intend to wear sneakers for that look. 

More pictures later! Cheerios!

Our wedding bands

I have always have very simple taste and do not like very extravagant jewellery. When I was very young and I knew I would get married, I was already telling people that I like this and this, that and that. My first choice was Georg Jensen's.

http://www.mallory-jewellers.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Georg_jensen_22.png

It is not very popular among Singaporean couples as compared to the Tiffany band or the Bvlgari where every bride in her twenties would definitely get one. 

When I got into my thirties, I decided that I'd want a simple one, one that is elegant yet simple in design. And so I picked this one. 

http://assets.cartier.com/sites/assets/files/styles/cartier-1000-1000/public/catms/images/B4077900_0_cartier_wedding-bands-rings.png?itok=PyuL86-8

A beautiful circle of clean cut diamonds, small, neat and well... just simple. I saw a girlfriend wearing it as a gift from her lesbian girlfriend and I thought to myself, that I would want a similar one but definitely not the Cartier one. 

And of course, not forgetting, the groom will be wearing a simple one as well like so:

http://hitchedukst.s3.amazonaws.com/Fashion/MensJewellery/images/12_710_1713HisandHerWeddingBands.jpg

Then one of my closest friend who was going through a divorce told me that she was once told there was a reason why wedding bands used to be just a simple gold band eons ago. It not only represents simplicity at its purest state (just like the love between husband and wife) but its smooth surface also means that there will be no obstacles. Bands must also be rock-free (or diamond-free) so that the marriage will not be rocky. 

She further add that those people she knows who are have blissful marriages have smooth, simple bands and one of them was her brother. Her wedding band for example, has rocks on it, hence the rocky marriage. 

I was amused with this tale but superstition or not, Ah Lau and I decided to believe it. After looking around especially in Love and Co and Goldheart which offered simple bands at an astonishing $1.6k and above (Love and Co was $1.8k), I was dismayed and disappointed. They were even more expensive than those with designs on them!

We walked around until we casually went to Corrine's Jewellery at Marina Square and decided that there was where we wanted to get our bands. They are genuine (for sure!) an American standard of 14 karat white gold that weighs pretty heavy in my hands. Not sure if it is because that rest of the make-up is zinc and copper but I am very happy with it. 

I read somewhere (I think on hardwarezone) that the service there is very poor and their jewellery is also in very bad quality. Not to me. The wedding bands are gorgeous. And since Ah Lau and I decided that a wedding band need not be so expensive because it is for daily wear, then we jumped into it and bought both at $600. 

Here they are:

Second draft checklist

Now for a part 2 checklist since we are 3 months away from the wedding. Here goes:

1. Pick wedding gowns [checked]
2. Chinese traditional items for 过大礼 [checked]
3. Nyonya tea dress [checked]
4. Wedding shoes [checked]
5. Emcee [checked]
6. Wedding bands [checked]
7. Videographer [checked]

Now for part 3
1. Band (maybe)
2. Groomsmen (pending Ah Lau again!!)
3. Wedding shoot (it'll be on the 19 Dec)
4. Nyonya shoes
5. Groom shoes
6. Groom shirts
7. Decor and flowers

过大礼 (preparation 1)

Mum and I went to Chinatown market to look around for what to get the groom for the 过大礼exchange. Of course there are the usual, 四点金 argument if it should come from the groom or accompanies the bride to be married off. Turns out, it is supposed to be part of a betrothal from a groom to ask for a bride's hands.

There is also the confusion if we are able to ask for a roast pig (since it is only a Cantonese tradition but according to this http://www.goldenhappiness.com.sg/bethrothal.html its not. And if we do, we can't ask for the 24 cans of pig trotters. Argh!

So to make things simple, we'll just get the usual traditional stuff and if one or two items are not in the specific dialect list, we'll still get it. In fact, my sister-in-law asked for a roast pig and 24 cans of pig trotters anyway.

In short, here is the list of things that Ah Lau needs to get me.

- 聘金
- 四点金 
- 2 pairs of dragon and phoenix candles
- peanut candy
- sesame candy
- 1 roast pig
- 12 oranges
- 2 bottles of wine
- 6 boxes of wedding cakes
- 老嫲糕 (for my grandma)
- 安床 things
- 1 tea set

And here are the things I would need to give back the groom.

- part of the 聘金
- a pair of the dragon and phoenix candles
- a pair of lamps
- 1 red basin and baby's bath tub
- towel
- bed linen
- tooth brush and tooth paste
- 1 belt and a pair of pants
- 2 bottles of orange juice
- 1 tea set

I think that's about it. The rest, I'll leave it my mum and Ah Lau's godma to ponder and add it.

Furniture shopping part 2

Ah Lau and I (or more like I did) jumped into paying for a super duper comfortable mattress at only $999 at Rozel! At first it was $2k+ then we bargained and told the sales manager whom I bought my first queen size maiden bed from couple of years ago, our difficulty to which he allowed us to just a small deposit (and I really mean very very small) and pay the rest when the mattress arrives 1 week before our wedding. Whew! Talk about meeting kind people.

We skipped buying the bed from Rozel though because none of them are what I have in mind and if we do, it is out of our budget. Finally, we decided to go with a cheap from Ikea first and since it is that princess-look that I love, Ah Lau has graciously agreed to us getting it. Ha!

http://www.dwdsm.com/3299-ikea-bed-frame-white/